bro I am doomed i wanted to come to a nice collage idky i have lost every connection none of ppl in my batch is going to give me any thing after the collage i m not capable of any thing i just fucked up here
i dont know jake shot dsa nahi ata nahi dev mai acha hu nahi kuch sub ko lagta ki mai chutiya hu (I don’t know, Jake shot, I don’t understand DSA i am good at Development but no body gives a shit on it turns out ppl are still better then me not equals i m down , I’m not good at it, everyone thinks I’m an idiot.) and no comfidence here nothing i m done here i m killing myself i wested my moms money i am gona west every thing i cannot stand thing cannot tackle my mom ,my mama(uncle) now i am fucked now bye every one
i m my collage 17 ppl are in walmart 25 ppl are in google and 10 ppl are in salesforce and 5 ppl in intiut and many i used to be with them at one point every body knows me i have help them but now i m not in any talking conditions with any of them none no one
as father as son i m done i m gona kill myself today a last time
bye...
My name is Meet Bhansuhali, a final-year Computer Science student at IIITL.
this is my story i formated it with chatgpt as cus of grammatical errors and easy understanding
In my first semester, I managed to form a good friend group within just three months. However, due to my tendency to exaggerate and seek attention, I ended up ruining my friendships. I went through a phase where I was trying to grab attention and acted like a narcissist, annoying others around me. Even though I made a good friend, I messed up that relationship too.
During this time, I lost focus on my studies, which was my main purpose for being there. Instead, I got caught up in social circles and seeking attention. As a result, I neglected my studies, especially Data Structures and Algorithms (DSA), thinking it wasn't important. I didn't pay attention to personal projects either, often using depression as an excuse to drop everything.
My ego became so big that even when friends I had fallen out with tried to reach out, I refused to give them any attention. I was too proud to mend the broken friendships, and this pride only brought me more guilt and regret.
From my first to fourth semester, I was somewhat involved with my technical society and had good connections with people who later secured placements at top companies like Google, Coinbase, Flipkart, and Amazon. I had even guided some of them, but now I feel like I've hit rock bottom and can't recall much of what I learned. I didn't participate in GSOC or any other significant projects because I didn't know how to approach people. I started some projects within my tech society but either left them midway or didn't attend meetings and do the necessary work. I wasted a lot of time feeling depressed, thinking about how others weren't talking to me and feeling isolated. I even started using weed to calm myself down.
I had friends, Palash and Parth, whom I had guided before, and now they're both at Coinbase. I thought they would help me or at least give me a chance for a referral, but they ended up giving referrals to almost everyone else in the tech society and didn't even inform me. When I asked for help, they straight-up ignored me, which hurt a lot.
I've wasted years of my life being depressed and didn't achieve anything significant. I've even injured myself, breaking my knuckles 6-7 times over these years. I had so much potential and wanted to create and accomplish great things, but I squandered it all.
At one point, I thought about ending my life but couldn't go through with it. Now, I've decided to seek help because I'm scared I won't be able to turn things around. It feels overwhelming, and I'm very confused about what to do next.
i have wasted 1.5 years in just weed ediction like 2-4 joints a day and drinking
Here's what I've done so far:
1. Before college, I worked on projects like [Sokka.io](https://sokka.io) and [Host.Sokka.io](https://host.sokka.io/).
2. I completed internships in DevOps and Data Science.
3. I also wanted to participate in ICPC contests.
This was last year, and now I feel like I've forgotten everything. I know I need to start with DSA and competitive programming (CP), but I'm embarrassed because I wasted so much time. I'm worried people will think I'm a fraud or just pretending to know things.
Here's the plan I've decided to follow:
I want to learn compiler design, and these live streams can help me:
- [AlexTheRealDev](https://www.youtube.com/@AlexTheRealDev/videos)
- [CocoCry](https://www.youtube.com/@cococry)
For DSA Fundamentals, I've found essential resources:
- [Luv CP](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLauivoElc3ggagradg8MfOZreCMmXMmJ-)
- [Codeforces Blogs](https://codeforces.com/blog/entry/91363)
For Advanced DSA:
- [AlgoExpert](https://www.algoexpert.io/)
- [SDE Sheets](https://sdesheets.bio.link/)
- [CSES Problem Set](https://cses.fi/problemset/), with [William Lin's Video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZ_6MS14Mg4) and [Editorials](https://codeforces.com/blog/entry/83343)
YouTube channels for further learning:
- [ThePrimeagen](https://frontendmasters.com/courses/algorithms/arrays-data-structure/)
- [CODEnCODE](https://www.youtube.com/@codencode)
- [TheAdityaVerma](https://www.youtube.com/@TheAdityaVerma) for Dynamic Programming (DP)
For Interview Preparation:
- [Grind 75](https://www.techinterviewhandbook.org/grind75)
- [Grokking the Coding Interview Patterns](https://github.com/dipjul/Grokking-the-Coding-Interview-Patterns-for-Coding-Questions)
For CS Fundamentals:
- Operating Systems: [OS Concepts](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3obEP8eLsCw)
- Databases: [DBMS](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dl00fOOYLOM&pp=ygUJYnViYmVyIGNu)
- Object-Oriented Programming: [OOPs](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhksGkjtKqk&t=2038s)
- Networking: [Computer Networks](https://tinyurl.com/28png6ca)
For Backend Development:
- [Node.js - Top 100 Interview Questions and Answers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nz-nPR5YJbw)
- [Top 100 React JS Interview Questions and Answers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfD_mS7XM0k)
For Coding Platforms:
- Competitive Programming: [CodeForces](https://codeforces.com/), [CodeChef](https://www.codechef.com/), [AtCoder](https://atcoder.jp/), [TopCoder](https://www.topcoder.com/), [Codeforces Gym](https://codeforces.com/gyms)
- Interview Preparation: [Leetcode](https://leetcode.com/), [HackerRank](https://www.hackerrank.com/), [GeeksforGeeks](https://www.geeksforgeeks.org/)
- Other Platforms: [HackerEarth](https://www.hackerearth.com/), [Codewars](https://www.codewars.com/), [Project Euler](https://projecteuler.net/)
my collage seniors are good but they think i am doing well mere ko sharam arahi hai unse baat kareme
if u have time plz guide me .
thank you,
Meet Bhanushali
i m scaed thta if i start now every body it will take a long time and very big comapnise are coming Zomato google and uber meesho oncampus i did
link to editor
Comments
Post a Comment